Wednesday, June 9, 2010

WOMAN BREAKS 14-YEAR SILENCE BY BREAKING WIND

BANGUS ONLINE — For Elanor Kargus from Regina it started with a stifled giggle then before the air and the room cleared, Elanor uttered her first two words in fourteen years. “Excuse me.”

Kargus took an oath of silence after getting arrested for calling a policeman a “neanderthal.” She held her tongue admirably while maintaining her job at a javelin manufacturing plant and also raising two children.

“My temper always kept me in trouble so I just figured I’d remove the root of all my trouble and it was actually really nice. I enjoyed the inner solitude. I still had all my friends and I was able to gesture.” Her self-imposed silence ended abruptly while playing shuffle board at a friend’s residence in nearby Pt. Lyre an upscale suburb of Regina.

“I farted and then I just lost it. I was mortified at first but then it just felt good to speak.”