Weird North Korean News
Secretive nation North Korea has some pretty weird items that Bangus readers may be interested in hearing about:
Women's bathing suits. Not the bathing suit your mother wore. Rather the bathing suit your grandmother wore! One piece with sort of mini-skirt around the hips.
Pizzas in Pyongyang cost 4 euros. Which is equivalent to 3 months salary for the average worker. There is at least one Pizzeria in the country.
Kimjongilia – a sort of red begonia flower named after the leader, Kim Jong Il.
The one amusement park in the capital city operates only on select days due to a shortage of fuel.
Here are a couple of rants from Bangus FA. The opinions presented are not those of the guy who uploads this stuff to the internet.
France:Aren’t you sick of all those people who are sick of the French. I mean mostly it’s just Americans who were angry about the French not going into Iraq. They’ve fallen silent after the war went badly in 2004. Anyways freedom fries are really just French fries, right Mr. McCain?
Germany: I am in love with Oktoberfest. Not just because it’s all about the beer but because it’s just such a great idea. Let’s keep our beer drinking to October only and we’ll all be a lot healthier. Then we can have a huge booze up for one month of the year.
Cambodia: How come there’s so much poverty in Cambodia and yet they got a large tourism industry. Possibly because of hookers but also because it’s exotic there and it’s so cheap. Sihanoukville, a resort made by Prince Sihanhouk is supposedly great but I’ve never been there. It’s pronounced “Snookieville” but has nothing to do with a fat girl on TV.
Leutonia? Cmon, it’s the 21st century already. Enough with the oboes and clarinets.
Bjorn Leitkopf, Swedish wrestling champ had the letter “W” tattooed to each of his buttocks to celebrate his victory in the national finals. At the end of the match, he pulled down his trunks, bent over and said “WoW, I’m the new champion”
Eyes of the world were on Toronto last week for the Toronto International Film Festival. Actual celebrities were present and walked down red carpets to watch films they starred in. Many of the celebrities noted what a vibrant, world class city Toronto has become! Some noted that Toronto was bigger than Hamilton or Ottawa or even Cleveland! Porn Star Sasha Grey spun discs at a disco on Saturday night!!!
A businessman was so enamoured of Pop diva Lady Gaga that he came to work in a business suit made entirely of meat. Incidentally, the man was a commodities future trader dealing in pork bellies. One old sow in HR is known to have said: “I wouldn’t be caught dead in that thing”
Swedish wrestler shows his enthusiasm.
Bjorn Leitkopf, Swedish wrestling champ had the letter “W” tattooed to each of his buttocks to celebrate his victory in the national finals. At the end of the match, he pulled down his trunks, bent over and said “WoW, I’m the new champion”
God hates Flags
Westboro Baptist Church are at it again. The cult-like Calvinist church from Topeka Kansas, known for it’s homophobia, ceremoniously burnt the flag of every country declaring: “God hates Flags”
Toronto Hosts Film Festival
Eyes of the world were on Toronto last week for the Toronto International Film Festival. Actual celebrities were present and walked down red carpets to watch films they starred in. Many of the celebrities noted what a vibrant, world class city Toronto has become! Some noted that Toronto was bigger than Hamilton or Ottawa or even Cleveland! Porn Star Sasha Grey spun discs at a disco on Saturday night!!! Businessman emulates Lady Gaga
A businessman was so enamoured of Pop diva Lady Gaga that he came to work in a business suit made entirely of meat. Incidentally, the man was a commodities future trader dealing in pork bellies. One old sow in HR is known to have said: “I wouldn’t be caught dead in that thing”Top Five most boring places
- Regina Saskatchewan – so flat you’d believe the earth was not round.
- Rainham, Kent, England – consists purely of houses and an oil rig offshore.
- Belgium – Dutchmen and Frenchmen who hate each other. Good beer though
- Laos – it’s exotic but not to the locals. Thailand has nightlife, Laos has rafting.
- Hungary – there are only jokes about lack of food
Worst TV Shows ever.
Here is a list of the worst TV shows ever made as determined by Bangus Foreign Affairs Staff. Some readers may not agree but too bad.
- Friends – Awful relationship comedy about dating. Scary. I hate the East Coast
- Home Improvement with Tim Allen – there were no jokes. I hate the Midwest.
- Cop Rock – a musical TV show with singing cops. I kid you not.
- News – God,who cares? Unless it’s a big terrorist attack or racism. I hate terrorists and racists.
- Gene Simmons –Maybe he’ll wipe his butt next episode.
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